Pull Up Your Pants!

Pet Peeve Alert: Saggy Pants

Seriously? If I wanted to look at a man’s ass, I would look at my husbands, not that of a zit faced kid walking down the street. I don’t even know where this trend came from, but please, do us all a favor and pull up your pants young man!

I was recently reminded of just how much I hate saggy pants when I saw a teenage boy walking home from school last week. His skinny jeans were sagging so low that he walked funny to keep them from falling down. He was wearing underwear that I assumed was clean since he was showing them off to the world, but regardless. UNDERwear is made to be worn UNDER your pants, not as outerwear.

The youngster was wearing a belt, but what’s the point when it was obviously not being worn for the purpose of why it was made. There is more than one notch on a belt so it can be tightened to fit various sized waistlines and not the “new” waistline that is below the ass, but the waist that is well, your waist!

I’ve heard this saggy pants trend originated in prison. There are lots of trends that originate in prison and should more than likely remain in prison and not filter into the neighborhoods of impressionable retarded white kids. Unless your Eminem, it’s probably best that you wear your pants properly. Heck, Eminem could run around naked if he so desires, because he is Eminem, not a dorky freshman walking home from school.

Look at it this way: If you (who wears saggy pants) and your buddy (who does not wear saggy pants) rob a convenience store and are chased by the PoPo, who do you think the police are gonna catch? Your BFF whose pants remain around his waist? Or your dumb ass that inevitably trips over your own when they fall down around your ankles? I would bet the man in blue catches you.

Here’s another way to look at it: When you go to prison because you robbed a convenience store, who do you think is gonna become the prison bitch? Your cellmate who wears his pants properly with a belt tightened very tightly around his waist? Or your dumb ass that is sagging his prison garb and drawing attention to his supple behind? I would bet that the bitch is you.

As you can see, the advantages of wearing your pants properly and with a belt that is tightened, as it should, clearly outweigh the disadvantages of sagging your pants. So, the next time you’re getting dressed to go to school, to hangout with your bros, or just getting dressed in general, ask yourself this, “Do I really want to become the prison bitch?”

I hope the answer would be “no”, so pull up your pants young man!