A woman's perspective on gun control

People have their own perspectives and opinions.  Each one is different from the other based on that individual’s experiences in life and how those experiences have shaped their thoughts.  My perspective is much more skewed than some because of how I make my living.  I am a cop.  I don’t get the luxury of seeing the world through ‘rose colored glasses.’  My trust in others can either get me killed or save my life, depending in whom I am placing that trust.  Most times, I trust no one and have very little faith in humanity.  It’s not a pretty way to view the world, but it is my perspective based on my personal experiences and it is how I choose to be.

I know not the experiences of others, unless they share, but even then I can only hear their words.  I cannot feel the emotions of their experiences.  I may have a similar experience, but I do not know how the way they live their lives has influenced and affected their views and they do not know mine.  I only know of what I know for me and these thoughts are solely my own.

In the wake of the recent horrific events at a nightclub in Orlando, Florida, people are calling for stricter gun laws.  This outrage after every mass shooting tragedy - San Bernardino, Newtown, Roseburg, just to name a few -  is understandable.  We are angry that such unthinkable acts are becoming so common and frequent and we feel helpless as to how to stop it.  A seemingly easy, and popular, solution is to get rid of the guns; to pass stricter gun laws, but this will not solve the underlying problem.  

We have ‘laws’ and ‘rules’ for everything in our lives and I see them being broken on a daily basis.  Sometimes it is I who is violating the law and I consider myself to be an upstanding citizen who pays my taxes on time and for the most part, obeys the laws and rules set forth by our government and other members of society.  Everyone has broken the law at some point in their life regardless of their social standing, religious background, or sexual orientation, and hopefully, no one was injured in the process.  

The speed limit in my city is 65mph and it is against the law to go faster.  If I get caught, I don’t necessarily go to jail, but I do get to pay a hefty fine.   How many of us break that law on a daily basis?  We justify that it’s okay to go 70mph or maybe even 75 because we’re late for work.  

The speed limit in a school zone is 25mph, but that seems incredibly slow when we’re in such a mad rush, so if we do 30 or maybe 35 this one time, it won’t be that big of a deal.  We expect nothing bad to happen so it’s okay.  At least it’s okay right up until it’s not, but we justify and make excuses as to why we speed.  Perhaps in the world of laws, speeding is really no big deal, but speed is limited for our safety and going faster is considered breaking the law whether we agree with it or not.

I live in a very rural part of my city, thus I allow my dog to run free when we are out for our hikes.  She likes to chase rabbits and squirrels and the occasional smaller dog if we come across one.  However, according to the San Diego County Code Sections 62.669(b) and 62.601(y), “If you walk or otherwise bring a dog to public or other private property (where dogs are permitted), you must restrain the dog by a hand held leash (not longer than 6 feet in length).  I justify breaking this law based on where I live.  My interactions with people are very limited during our hikes and in my opinion, this law is a minor one.  However it is the law and by allowing my dog to run free, I am in violation.

Breaking these laws we consider minor doesn’t necessarily make us bad people, but if we look at it from a right and wrong point of view, we are wrong.  We are violating laws that have been put in place for the safety of society.  In my line of work, I meet many people who have violated the law in some regard.  I have dealt with everyday people in court for drunk driving, drug possession, and violating restraining orders.  People who could have been my friends, neighbors, and family members.  Good people.  I have also dealt with people who’ve broken laws that most people consider unconscionable  - rape, murder, and child molestation.  

My point is, laws, regardless of how minor or extreme an individual may feel they are, are being broken on an hourly basis.  They are being broken by the local pastor, the Police Chief, the mayor, your mom.  Just because it is law and even when the ramifications for breaking such laws are severe (example: time spent in prison), people will still justify and bend the law to fit their own ideals.  And frankly, there are those people who break laws because they simply don’t give a shit because they have no respect for others or for themselves.

So, I ask this: Will stricter gun laws remove the guns from the hands of those people who really really want a gun?  NO, it will not.  Law abiding citizens obey gun laws, criminals do not. Laws, regardless of how stringent they are, will always be broken by someone who has no regard for laws.  Stricter gun laws would increase the chances of those law abiding citizens of becoming victims, because they cannot adequately defend themselves.  

It is time for society to stop preaching “one love” because as swell as that may sound, it will never ever happen.  People need to stop trying to view the world as a rainbow, butterfly, unicorn kitten and start accepting it for what it is: flawed, abusive, and fucking scary.  Ignorance is not bliss, especially when it is getting innocent people killed.  

Most times I have a cop’s perspective and that is what I have been sharing so far.  Working around bad people is what I have been doing for the last 25 years, so again, my viewpoint is slanted towards the nefarious aspects of society.  However, I am also a woman and have a woman’s perspective.  For me, that perspective is much more important, although it’s still a bit cynical.

I have many fears as a woman, and rape is the most prominent one. Rape is ugly in every way imaginable and something that I think about on a daily basis.  Not in the extreme that I think every single man I meet is going to rape me - although I think anyone, man or woman, is capable of anything they want to do whether it’s good or bad - but thinking more about the situations I put myself into and how to keep myself safe.  

One way I keep myself from being a victim is I carry a gun.  Fortunately, I have never had to point it at someone, but the comfort of knowing it is within reach gives me a sense of, well, comfort. Just because I carry though, does not mean I purposely put myself in dicey situations and having it tucked into my waistband certainly does not make me invincible.  I do not allow carrying a gun to give me a false sense of security.  I know the risks involved, but I have been trained and am rather proficient in its use.  I am comfortable carrying a gun.

I want to keep my right to bear arms because I want to have that added option of protection.  Protection for me and my family.  I don’t pretend that if something happened, like a robbery or shooting at a nightclub, I would play superhero and insert myself into the path of danger to save the world.  I like to think that I would respond positively to protect others, but one never knows how one will truly react until put into any given situation.  

However, I can say, if a bad man tried to hurt me or my family, I would definitely put up a fight.  Calling 911 will probably not save me if someone is breaking into my home as response times by my local law enforcement to my area can vary (depending on all the variables in play).  That’s not a chance I want to take.  I don’t want to wait for someone else to rescue me and hope they get to me in time.  

Self-defense tactics might not work either, especially against someone stronger and bigger or if there is more than one attacker.  A gun in my hand, though, just might save my life even if it is at the expense of another, but that's the choice they made when they broke into my home and/or attacked me.  A gun is a great equalizer for any woman in a fight, plus I’d be able to defend myself from a safer distance and hopefully minimize harm to myself. 

The world has become a dangerous place and thinking that violence will never affect ones own community is living in denial.  It’s making yourself an easy target, it’s making yourself a victim, it’s putting your kids in harms way, it’s allowing someone else to dictate the way you live your life.  

The human race is unpredictable and we need to realize unscrupulous people come in every shape and size.  They don’t wear signs advertising their evil intentions.  They come with a smile, offering a helping hand and aren’t always unknown to us.  Over the past several years, mass shootings have occurred at such places like movie theaters, schools, and churches.  Soft targets where people are the most vulnerable and bad people can do the most damage in the least amount of time because no one saw them coming and no one was prepared.  

Yes, a gun can be a dangerous weapon, but so can everything else in life.  In 2007, a woman in Sacramento died from water intoxication after drinking too much water during a radio station’s water drinking contest.  Probably not the smartest decision on the woman’s part, but do we need to enact ridiculous water drinking laws to protect those people from their own stupidity?  Earlier this month, a woman died after being impaled by a flying beach umbrella at Virginia Beach.  An incredibly sad and tragic accident, but do we now need to ban beach umbrellas for fear of being stabbed while we sunbathe?

These are freak accidents, but a more common item that can be used as a deadly weapon is a car.  Drunk driving is against the law, but how many people have done it?  According to Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD), “over 1.1 million drivers were arrested in 2014 for driving under the influence of alcohol or narcotics.” After a long week at work, happy hour beckons.  “I’ll only have a few,” but on an empty stomach that few can be too many.  “I live just a mile away,” but in that mile you hit and kill a kid on his bike.  Do we become a dry nation and ban all alcohol because the .08% limit certainly isn’t preventing people from drinking too much?  Do we ban cars because they’re dangerous when driven improperly?  

In California, all drivers are banned from using a hand-held cellphone while driving (texting included), but I see people breaking this law every single day while on my way to and from work.  Stricter cellphone laws won’t prevent people from distracted driving and stricter gun laws won’t prevent guns from falling into the hands of criminals.

The problem is the person, not the gun in their hand or car, cellphone, jug of water, or even the beach umbrella.  It boils down to how that person was raised, his or her influences, and role models in life.  It depends on how that person chooses to be. We all instinctively know right from wrong, but some people just don’t give a fuck about what happens to you, to me, to anyone.  Stricter laws of any kind will not stop a person from doing what he or she wants to do whether it’s speeding or killing a bunch of innocent people.  

Stricter gun laws is not a viable solution.  Again, the problem is the sick individual holding the gun, not the gun itself and that is what we need to fix. The person.

I’m not sure what I’d hope to accomplish with this post, but I felt I needed to voice my opposition to those screaming hard for stricter gun laws.  The Internet is filled with the same posts and messages about the subject, but these people don’t seem to be adding anything new to the argument.  It is simply a regurgitation of whatever is trending on Facebook and Twitter and that is alarming as people seem more comfortable to be sheeple (followers) than individuals who can act for themselves and think, even though I hate this term, ‘outside the box’.  

I believe that individuals have the right to live in whatever manner they choose and whatever perspectives you have, I am not criticizing you nor your right to not carry.  I am only sharing my thoughts as I think them however, I do ask that you not interfere with my right to live in the manner I choose and that includes my right to carrying a gun.